keeps getting crazier....

Someone who was looking at my Instagram mentioned to me the other day that they had read my most "recent" blog post. "Oh, that old post?" I felt like replying. It made me think about how much has happened since I logged in here and I felt like I should update.  I guess blogging has gone by the wayside as an uncool form of social media, but I have been blogging here for so long it feels weird to let it go altogether.

It has been a crazy month or so.  I did survive September.  One of my students with significant behavior concerns ended up being placed out of district, which I think was the best thing for him.  That took a lot off my plate.  We were also able to get another one of my students who wants to harm herself hospitalized, which was a huge relief for me.  I had literally been losing sleep over her situation.  So things at work are still rough, but improved from September when I was so discouraged that I had not been able to get a new job.

Another exciting piece of news is that I am expecting another baby!  Total surprise!  I had chalked up my late period, weight gain and total exhaustion to the craziness and stress of this school year.  I finally said to Ryan as I dozed off on the couch at like 6:30 one night, "I have not been this dead tired since I was pregnant with Hannah" and that was when things started to click. The Saturday the Pope was in town I took a pregnancy test to "rule that out" and spent the rest of the weekend in total shock.  Shock and terror continued as I went to the OB/GYN expecting them to give me a due date of, like, July, and was told my baby is coming mid-April as an ultrasound revealed a perfect little profile with a waving hand.   I pretty much missed the whole first trimester, so I have had to squeeze in some appointments for blood work and what not to make up for lost time. We will have the anatomy scan/gender reveal a week from tomorrow.

I feel pretty good (people's favorite thing to ask you when you are pregnant-- how are you feeling?).  We have had so much going on lately that I haven't even really had a chance to think about being pregnant, so I guess that is good; so different from my other two pregnancies where I obsessed over every little thing.  Once in a while when I am laying still at night, I can feel the little fluttery movements.  Anyways, I think that is part of the reason I didn't end up getting a new job.  It would have been awkward to start in a new district and then go out on maternity leave.  And now I only have to hang on until mid-April, instead of the end of June. We don't have any room in our house for another baby, or really any money to pay for him or her, but we are excited now.

The other big thing that happened is a lot of health concerns.  My mom was hospitalized for about a week after she became ill as she returned from a trip to Canada.  Then Ryan began to have stomach pain and digestive issues.  He left work early one day and went to the ER where he ended up being admitted for ten days.  Turns out he has ulcerative colitis. They also helped him acknowledge and begin to deal with the fact that he is diabetic.  It was so hard without him around-- I have always appreciated how hands on Ryan is as a dad and how much he helps out around the house, but I was reminded again of how well we work as a team when half of that team was missing for so long.  Thankfully, he was able to come home last Thursday.  He is still on a restricted diet and he has a visiting nurse checking in with him for the next few weeks, but he is definitely on the road to recovery.

Then, literally the day after Ryan returned home, I had Hannah with me at the grocery store as I was picking up a few food items.  Hannah has been fussy and refused to ride in the cart, only wanting to be held so I had her on my hip as I loaded our groceries onto the conveyor belt.  Suddenly she threw her head backwards.  I turned to her to scold her and saw that her eyes had rolled up into her head and that she was stiff and shaking.  I just began shouting out "My baby is having a seizure!  My baby is having a seizure!" and screaming hysterically.  A man came running over and urged me to put her on the floor.  I didn't want to but he helped me put her down and cradled her head as she continued to convulse and shake.  Suddenly a crowd had formed around me.  A lady in neon green pants crouched beside me rubbing my back and telling me that it would be okay.  The cashier in the lane next to me took out her cell phone and called 9-1-1.  She was asking me questions about Hannah and I could barely think straight to answer them ("How old is she?"  "What's your name?"), because I was so sure that I was going to watch my baby die right here on the floor of Pottstown Giant.  Another woman ran up, handed me a string of light blue rosary beads and told me to hold them against Hannah. Then she began praying and chanting in Spanish.  I continued to crouch over Hannah and wail as the manager of the grocery store tried to clear people away from me.

Finally Hannah's body relaxed and she opened her eyes and began to cry.  This was right as the EMT's arrived.  They took us both in an ambulance.  They put the siren on, which scared me because Hannah and I have actually ridden in an ambulance together before, when I started bleeding heavily after she was born and they didn't turn the siren on then.  They put an IV in her foot and took her vitals as we raced across town.  I called Ryan, but he didn't know what to do.  He was stuck at home with no car.  (We had to leave his car behind at the hospital because one of the medication he is on leaves him too dizzy to drive.)  He ended up calling our good friends the Hilberts who brought him to the ER and then eventually took us back to the grocery store to get my car.

When he got to the hospital, they discovered that Hannah had a fever of 104.5.  This high and sudden fever had caused the seizure, which the doctor assured me was nothing to be too concerned about. They gave her some Tylenol and let me hold her until her fever came down and then they sent us on our way.  She was groggy but her sweet self by the time we got her home.

Anyways, all of these scares has really made me so grateful so my own good health, for the fact that Ryan and I both have good jobs with paid time off and good health insurance, friends, family and ward members who helped with babysitting, offered to bring meals and helped with rides.  We are so fortunate.