Not Me Monday

I am NOT completely obsessed with my bagless vacuum. I do NOT repeatedly take out the canister and examine what I have sucked up before and after each new room. I do NOT feel a huge sense of satisfaction as a dump the contents into the trash can. I did NOT skip out of church after Sacrament Meeting this week. Isaac won't go to primary without me and I couldn't bring myself to balance on a tiny sunbeam sized chair and endure Sharing Time this week. EPIC MORMON MOTHER FAIL. We have NOT each been missing one shoe for over a week now (his croc and my red sneaker). All of my closets and bedrooms are perfectly organized and important things like sneakers are never lost or misplaced. They are always in their proper place where we can find them easily. I did NOT allow Isaac to eat Honey Nut Cheerios straight from the box for pretty much every meal this weekend. This is NOT how my hair has looked since Thursday. It's clean(ish), but with no AC at work, trying to excercise regularly, doing the windows down thing instead of the AC in the car, what is the point of running a comb through it when it? Also, going along with this picture, my principal did NOT ask me if I had pink eye. Nope, just never-ending seasonal allergies, thanks! I am not blogging when I should be preparing for my work week and tidying up the house. What have you NOT been doing this week?

This is what happens...

when I clean out my fridge...

I inherited all of my parents condiments when they moved last summer.

And I was horrified today to discover how many were well beyond their expiration dates.

Next to tackle: the medicine cabinet.

Tom's House Warming

It was a perfect Saturday for a BBQ at my brother Tom's new place in Norristown. Isaac and Tom's little dog Lucy. She and Isaac LOVE each other.

Water balloon fun... Tom manning the grill. The chickens were balanced precariously on beer cans.

The whole fam on Tom's front porch. Hayley, Lucy, Dad, me, Tom, Isaac and Mom.

Thanks for being such great hosts Tom and Hayley!

I'm the devil

Here's another lovely gem from today's paper. (There are generally 2-3 comments like this a day). "It's time for people to listen up. Why are the children having so many car accidents? Because the schools did away with driver's education. Why? Because of the budget. Why is the budget so high? Because of the teachers. It's a domino effect. The teachers hold the people and school children hostage. The budget goes up so they can get their way satisfied; they cut school programs and raise taxes." Evidently I'm responsible for teenagers crashing their cars. And no one told me that as I teacher I control the budget. Funny, I thought it was the elected school board officials that approved that.... I also heard teachers were responsible for the increased price of gasoline, global warming and the broken oil pipeline... *Eye roll* It's always fun to see who has more nasty messages, teachers or "illegal" immigrants...

Seriously???

On the radio this morning the DJ pronounced "epitome" as "epee-tome". What is the world coming to??

It's no secret...

...that I love Alanis Morrisette.

"Flinch" What's it been over a decade? It still smarts like it was four minutes ago We only influenced each other totally We only bruised each other even more so What are you my blood? You touch me like you are my blood What are you my dad? You affect me like you are my dad How long can a girl be shackled to you How long before my dignity is reclaimed How long can a girl stay haunted by you Soon I'll grow up and I won't even flinch at your name Soon I'll grow up and I won't even flinch at your name Where've you been? I heard you moved to my city My brother saw you somewhere downtown I'd be paralyzed if I ran into you My tongue would seize up if we were to meet again What are you my god? You touch me like you are my god What are you my twin? You affect me like you are my twin How long can a girl be tortured by you? How long before my dignity is reclaimed And how long can a girl be haunted by you Soon I'll grow up and I won't even flinch at your name Soon I'll grow up and I won't even flinch at your name So here I am one room away from where I know you're standing A well-intentioned man told me you just walked in This man knows not of how this information has affected me But he knows the colour of the car I just drove away in What are you my kin? You touch me like you are my kin What are you my air? You affect me like you are my air

(That's for you WJM)

tee hee